The crazy one's...
Rob a bank
Because security is now so sophisticated, bank robbery is not so easy unless your are Catherine Zita or Sean Connery. It has now come back with a vengeance this year, and the only qualification you need is to be an ex bank chief exec.
Marry a rich celebrity
Celebs and sports stars are a good bet. Find out where they hang out, put on your best gear and pretend your either good in bed or a loaded heir or heiress to a fortune. It helps if you haven't got a face like a bag of chisels.
Invent something
Find something that everyone wants to buy. It could be a remote control that enables you to become the ultimate couch potato. OK, it does the TV, music and lights but that's been done already. Perhaps it could update your Twitter, answer the phone, check your stocks and shares, wake you up at midday, text your friends and of course order the pizza. Don't forget the automatic entrance door opener and mechanical pooch to bring the pizza so you don't have to get out of the pit.
Internet scam
Pretend you are are the daughter of a Nigerian general who has recently deceased, and you need someone to look after your millions. When those millions of stupid people reply with their bank details you can rob them blind. Or you could sell a new form of viagra that enables someone to pitch a tent for three weeks.
Big brother contestant
If you are slightly deranged, look like you do not belong on this planet, a gender that know one has heard of before or simply looking to become a star for a few weeks, the tabloids will pay you lots of money for a story that they think is interesting for people whos daily outfit doesn't include a straight jacket.
Blackmail a millionaire
Follow lots of millionaire business men around all day long, when you find one who is cheating on his wife, threaten to tell her unless he sends you a large amount of money. Or better still, if his wife is messing about blackmail them both.
Now for the sensible one's...
Start your own business, and work bloody hard for about five years or more
Lots of people become very wealthy because they work hard at building a successful business. In my opinion the internet is now the place for modern day entrepreneurs to create something special that other people find very useful. If you are good at something already, turn it into a business.
Stocks and shares
Find yourself a good broker, study the markets hard and spread your risk. You will need reasonable capital to start off and a lot of patience. The market is increasing, but don't look for the quick fix. I have a friend who started with £10K and made over a million. Unfortunately lost it all on spread betting. Don't get hooked!
Buy lots of high quality low priced property
As I run Millionaire Investments I had to put this one in. But property is at its lowest prices globally for at least five years. You can also get amazing cash back deals or rental guarantees. If you have a pension that isn't doing much, put some commercial property into it. You can now buy overseas hotel rooms as part of a SIPP. Lots of opportunities to create wealth from a well planned property portfolio. After all most of the world's wealthy may have created initial wealth through business, but many have increased their wealth dramatically through building a property portfolio.
OK, that's only nine, so if anyone has any other ideas on how to become a millionaire please respond, no matter how ridiculous you think they might be.
Good luck!
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